Don’t Allow Your Life To Be Controlled By These 5 Things // Do you want to know how to be happier, live a better life and reach your full potential? The truth is that to live the life of your dreams, you must let go and stop letting certain things control you. It may be that you need to develop a strong mind, break free from bad habits or learn how to let go of the past. In this video, peak performance expert and coach Eric Partaker, explains 5 things you should never let control you so that you can take back control of your life, become your best self and reach your full potential.
KEY POINTS
Don’t Let Your Past Define You – The past no longer exists, the future hasn’t happened yet. What’s done is done. Live in the moment. Make the right choices at the right time and create the better future that you seek.
Ignore The Naysayers – Don’t let other people hold you back from pursuing your ambitions. Ignore other people and do what feels right for you and your life.
The Future Is In Your Hands – Don’t let self doubt and limiting beliefs define you. The mind will do what you push it to do. If you tell it to find excuses, what is it going to find? Excuses. Take Action today, and stop making excuses.
Who’s In Your Inner Circle? – Ensure that people you’re spending time with are people that matter to you, and people who will help further your dreams. Take all the relationships in your life and categorize them into either energy drainer or energy generator. Who do you think you should be spending more time with?
Don’t Chase The Money – Focus not on chasing money, but creating value for others. When you focus on others and creating value for them, you’ll be shocked and surprised how your financial situation starts to change very rapidly.
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TRANSCRIPT
Eric Partaker: Today, I’m going to share with you five things that you should not let control you so that you can become all that you are capable of being.
Hi, my name is Eric Partaker, and I’ve been recognized as the CEO of the year. And I’m also the author of two best-selling books, including The Three Alarms. So number one, do not let your past define your present or future. The past no longer exists. The future hasn’t happened yet. However, the best way we can create our future is by living in the present and doing the things that are consistent with us at our best, and that we believe will further our life and create benefit for ourselves and for others. But don’t let yourself become a prisoner of your past. Mistakes that you’ve made, they are in the past. Ask yourself, okay, well, what can I learn from them? And then apply that in the present to create the future that you seek. You don’t have a time machine. You can’t go in the past, you can’t change anything. What’s done is done. But what you can do from this moment in time is live here in the present, making the right choices, and then choice after choice, they accumulate good choices compound over time, and they create the better future that you seek.
Number two, ignore the naysayers and the opinions of others. Don’t let other people hold you back and not pursue your ambitions, your truths, or the things that you want to do, experience or achieve in life. I’ll give you an example. So in the United States, I went to the University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign. It’s not Harvard, it’s not Princeton, it’s not Yale, it’s not one of these Ivy league schools, but it’s a good solid school. But it’s still not at that absolute top caliber, and I wanted to get a job at McKinsey and company, which is known as one of the best strategy consulting firms in the world, but I didn’t have the background to get into a company like that. And a lot of people told me that I had no chance, that I didn’t have the Harvard degree, the Yale degree, the Princeton degree, and so there was no point in applying.
But I applied anyways and I prepared for the interviews. And I took some time to get to get to know the recruiter of the Chicago office, which was the office to which I applied. And I made it through the whole interview process. And there was 2000 applications for just 22 positions, and I was able to secure one of those positions because I ignored the naysayers. And as a result, I got what was my dream job at the time.
After McKinsey, I came across a tech company, Skype. I was using Skype and it’s very, very early days. And I knew nothing about tech. And I shared with some of my friends that I wanted to get involved with a company like that. And I really liked that the company, and they all said, “Yeah, but you don’t have the tech background for that. You won’t be able to get a job with them.” And here’s what happened. I applied for a job at Skype. This is going all the way back to 2005. I applied for a job with Skype and they said no and they rejected me.
But I ignored that, and three months later, I tried again and I stated my case again. And then, I was given a job at Skype. And I was one of 30 people in a small office in London in the very, very early days of the company. And as a result of ignoring the opinion of others and getting that job, I was able to help the company grow from 30 people to 500 people. And we even then sold the company to eBay for a while over $2 billion, all because I ignored what other people thought I should or shouldn’t do and did what I thought I should do, and I kept trying as well.
Number three, don’t allow self-doubt and limiting beliefs to control you, because if you let them in, they will completely suffocate you. Most of our self-doubt and limiting beliefs in my experience relate to fear of some form, fear of failing, fear of disappointing others, fear of something that we’re about to do being too hard. But here’s the truth, anything worth achieving, anything worth experiencing, success, the thing that you’re after in maybe you work and life, it all requires some form of payment. And that payment does come in the form of hardship. It does come in the form of effort, but it feels good, it feels worthwhile when you know that you’re putting in what’s needed to slowly build yourself and make your dreams closer and closer and closer.
And I can give you a perfect example with the production of content. So in what I do now for a living, trying to help and inspire people to close that gap between their current and best self, a lot of what I do involves producing content. Sometimes it’s written content in the form of my blog, sometimes it’s audio content in the form of my podcast. Sometimes it’s video content in the form of my YouTube channel. But prior to producing content, obviously I had no experience doing it, and the idea of producing stuff at a high quality level consistently day in, day out, year after year, when I first thought about it, it was absolutely overwhelming. But it’s all very, very difficult, and it seems overwhelming until you just get started. So watch out for that self-doubt and limiting beliefs because if you start pushing into the very areas that you feel you find difficult, you’ll find that the door pushes a little bit easier than you expected and that as you continue practice and get better and better, you develop that skill, you develop that confidence and those limiting beliefs and those self-doubt fades away.
Number four, don’t allow yourself to be controlled by bad relationships. Make sure that the people that you’re spending time with are people that matter to you, are people that will help further your dreams, are people that will help support you. Be careful with those that drain you of energy, with those that make you feel down. You need to ask yourself, and it can feel like a pretty brutal exercise, but you almost need to literally take all the people, all the relationships in your life and try to categorize them as either an energy drainer or an energy generator. And where do you think you need to be spending more time? With the energy generators. And what do we do with the energy drainers? Well, we perhaps voice our opinions or our concerns and try to turn the relationship around. Maybe that person is feeling overly negative, and we need to let them know. We need to hold a mirror to their face so that they realize that they’re not only bringing themselves down, but bringing you down as well.
But unfortunately, some relationships we just need to cut. If there are toxic people in your life who are bringing you down or causing harm, or aren’t good for you in some way, and there’s no really good way to turn it around, well, then you need to step away from those relationships. Spend more time with the people who help generate energy, who help generate happiness in your life, and less time or no time with those that drain or take it away.
Number five, don’t let yourself be controlled by chasing the money. Now, money is important. It’s not a bad thing at all, but you’ll find that you create a lot more wealth in your life and you give yourself the opportunity to earn even more if you focus not on chasing the money, but on creating value. How can I create value for others? How can I help others? How can I serve others? When you focus on others and creating value for them, you’ll be so shocked and surprised how your financial situation starts to change very, very rapidly. The money has to flow from somewhere, right? So if you don’t have as much as you would like, well, you don’t have a money printing machine. You can’t just print money and then suddenly you have more. It needs to flow from someone else. So how do you create that flow? By focusing on value once again. What is it that you can do that creates value for others so that the flow of money from them to you is simply a by-product or a result of the value that you’ve created for them?
And I’d love to hear from you, so don’t forget to leave a comment and a rating as well. And if you’d like to get a copy of my new book, The Three Alarms, please head over to my website at ericpartaker.com. That’s E-R-I-C ericpartaker.com, where you can pick up a free digital copy of my new best-selling book, The Three Alarms.
